my Sanctuary


Welcome to my sanctuary. This is a place for me to share the ups and downs of my life as a mother, woman, friend, and subbie. To revel in the triumphs and work through the difficult parts, but to always be me...the good...the bad...and the playful.


YEAH!! I did it!! *PARTY* yep, that’s right, I accomplished my goal and I walked 10 miles today.  YES!! I am so proud of myself.  To think, it was just at the beginning of this month that it was so difficult to just walk one mile and here I am 26 days later, and I walked 10 miles. At a pretty good clip too.  Okay well, it is true that today I did all my miles on the gazelle glider and it took me just under 90 minutes.

For now, I’m going to keep at the 10 mile distance but I want to decrease the amount of time that it takes me to do it.  I want to spend at least a week with the goal of just staying under 90 mins.  After a week, I want to see what a reasonable time to decrease to as a goal.  I want to continue to push myself until I reach my goals, but I want them to be attainable for my fitness level.

I’m going to start weighing myself on the first of February and then again on the first of March.  Hopefully, I’ll see a large decrease in the total.  I’m going to try and NOT get obsessive about the weighing part, as I have a tendency to do just that.  However, I really want to stay on track. 

This is probably the most stable emotionally that I have been in a long time, and I’m enjoying it.  For now, I can see me hanging on to that stability at the very least long enough to start seeing a difference in myself.  And, long enough that depression is not going to side swipe me.  This past year I have been suffering from depression.  Not that I knew that that’s exactly what it was.  And at first it was scaring the crap out of me.   Suddenly, I was unable to control my emotions or my reactions to things.  I felt unstable and that just made things worse on all fronts.  My relationships suffered; I suffered.  It’s a year I hope to never repeat again.

But knowledge is power, and I have an understanding of what was going on.  It did get to the point that I went to a doctor to find out what was wrong with me, and I have been put on medication for it.  But, even the meds are not a quick fix; there is still a great deal of work that needs to be done, as well as time. 

There is a lot of work to be done, and thankfully I have been given the time and the space to do it in.  I’m growing and learning every day.  Some days are always easier than others, but I do know one thing…that for every day for the last 26 days I have had ONE victory.  I WALKED! And today, I walked 10 miles, and that my friends is a WONDERFUL feeling.


TinyShrimp said...

wooohhoooo! Congrats!

aislinn said...

*blushes* thanks :D

Lorien said...

YAAAY! Keep with it!

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